Disappointment is not an emotion I expected to feel today.
It's the last day of preschool for Kate, who moves on to Kindergarten next fall. While I think the whole 'graduation' from preschool thing is pretty goofy, there's no denying that it's a big milestone. And I was looking forward to seeing her stand up there with all her friends for one last time, singing songs and celebrating the end of her first school experience. Then there would be cake and cookies and lots of hugs for the teachers who've been part of her life for two years now. I expected to feel proud, excited, and maybe even a little wistful. But we're not having any of that.
Kate has strep throat.
Forget the celebration. We've got a sick little girl stuck on the couch watching cartoons and feeling horrible. The truth is, she doesn't seem to mind missing graduation much. I think to her it's just another weird event. For me, it's an ending that will never come again, the last time I'll have a preschooler. And instead of marking the moment with ceremony and photos, it's just sort of slipping away. So even though I do feel all those swirling emotions when I think about it, mostly I feel disappointed.